Declaring your independence

When I set out to make the jump from being in business for myself part-time to full-time many years ago this week, there were a few desires guiding my decisions. My desire to work where I wanted, be more autonomous in my work and live by a schedule that better fit the way I wanted to enjoy my life were some of the underlying motivations.

But while there were many life circumstances that propelled that decision (leap), the most important of them was understanding my values at a deeper level.

Freedom and balance have been among my core values for as long as I can remember. When I decided to be more intentional about the values that shape my life and decision-making, and began actively designing my work and life from that knowledge, so much fell into place. And not just the future, but the past. I better understood how I learn best, why I’d chosen the work and workplaces I had chosen, how I prefer to nourish my spirit and why I had always been attracted to different ways of doing things, new ideas and perspectives and making my own rules.

On the day that I left my home in Massachusetts and a secure job for the west coast and self-employment, it was because there was a part of me that knew that I had everything I needed to reinvent my life and work from a new and more nourishing perspective. It was all about embracing that, better understanding my strengths, needs and values, and declaring independence from ways of thinking and being that would likely have kept me complacent and in place.

I’ve repeated that process a few times since then, each time that change sets its sights on me. Eventually, that process, fueled and developed by my years of coach training and diving into wellbeing and change research, became the way that I share, encourage and invite sustainable success. It’s the way that I learned to declare independence from what doesn’t fit for me, what is outgrown, what holds me back or is leftover from another season of life (without letting go of the things that matter more).

What will you declare independence from this year?

The illusion of safety in a job that’s going nowhere and not meeting your needs?
Work that is draining you (or worse, damaging your health) instead of challenging and growing you?
An ingrained, unchallenged habit or belief that’s holding you back or making life more difficult than it needs to be?
The (false) idea that you’re too old, too young, too settled, too indecisive, too something to create more of what you really want in life?
The inner judge or saboteur voice that’s on repeat in your head?
A routine that’s more focused on getting by and getting things done than on the type of nourishing self-care and balanced living that is truly energizing?
Old patterns or ways of being that may have gotten you where you are but are hindering your next steps.

In the words of philosopher, mystic and activist Simone Weil: “Liberty, taking the word in its concrete sense, consists in the ability to choose."

What is it that you're choosing? If you’d like a few proven ways to unleash renewed energy, exercise different choices and invite more freedom and ease, try these.

Drop the things that you know drain you

This can be a challenge to put into practice as a habit. Let's start anyway. It’s easy to manufacture reasons to hold onto what is clearly sucking the life out of us because movement and change can open up uncertainty. When we embrace the trickiness and the stickiness of identifying what is draining us, we free up surprising amounts of energy that we can use for what truly matters to us and moves us in the directions that we want to move. To put this into practice right away, make a list of 10 things that drain you but that you’ve been putting up with anyway. Then move down the list until you’ve eliminated or solved them all.

Find out what energizes and stretches you

The mindsets, behaviors and strengths that come naturally to us and that we enjoy using energize us. Leveraging this natural energy is documented to reduce stress, improve wellbeing and enhance productivity. Overusing it, though, can get in your way. If you’re not clear on what your strengths are or how to effectively develop and deploy them, it’s time to find out. To put this into practice right away, consider booking a Rooted in Strengths assessment and coaching session.

Clear your calendar by half (or at least rethink it)

Yes, this can be hard to do when we’re juggling competing roles and responsibilities. It’s hard because it requires us to examine our priorities and our time commitments and where they match and where they don’t match. This self-honesty comes also with the work of setting boundaries and communicating them. These can be simple but not easy challenges, but they’re always worth the effort of learning to become more comfortable with the discomfort. To put this into practice, try the exercise I often do with leaders: If you were to be your most resourceful, creative and something very important to you depended on it, how might you find 50% more time next week for your top priorities?

Say yes with intention and clear boundaries

What’s most important to you at this time in your life and career? Pick 4 or 5 top priorities. The people, projects and parts of your world that you can say — or need to say — an enthusiastic yes to rise to the top of this list. Use this as your navigational guide for where you spend your time, resources and energy. If it’s not on this list, and it’s not a must-do for a legitimate reason, then feel free to guiltlessly give it a pass.

Translate your values into goals

Where in your life are you in a phase of goal-setting? While we often focus on building SMART (specific, meaningful, adaptive, realistic, time-framed), and that’s a helpful, effective framing, what’s equally important and perhaps more important is how these goals connect to your most important values. How do the goals you’re setting align with what matters to you? If you were to translate your most important values into a set of actionable short and long-term goals, how might you do that?

What does exercising your choice, declaring independence and renewing your energy mean in your life? Which of these practices might help you achieve that?

If you’d like support to get there, check out my individual coaching options. We can co-create your next steps together.