Give yourself a time out
A few years ago, I started an experiment. It began with a birthday gift from a friend: Wayne Muller's book, Sabbath: Finding Rest, Renewal and Delight in Our Busy Lives.
As someone who has long cultivated various nourishing habits, I dove in, eager to see what I might learn and incorporate. Inspired, by the end of the book, I’d decided to set aside one day a week in which I turn off my devices and disconnect from the electronic world. No phone. No email. No computer. Not even reading on my iPad.
It was one of the best decisions I've made because even though I was not hyper connected, it had profound effects.
Suddenly, there seemed to be more time. Time to go to the park and watch live music. Time for deeper conversations with my partner and friends. Time for gardening, cooking a leisurely breakfast, a walk, reading the old-fashioned way in hard copy. Time for the deeper work tasks.
There was more mental space. Space to really think about my business and how I want to grow and evolve it (and how not). Space to imagine and vision and stare off into the garden. Space to let my mind settle and quiet. More spaciousness in my workday schedule.
Initially, yes, managing these shifts presented challenges. But then they became a welcome respite. A place where I could more intentionally and more effectively manage the energy that I bring to the rest of the week. Digital Sabbaths soon moved from an experiment to informing how I approach all of my week.
When I began thinking about what I wanted my next year to look like, pauses and time outs made the cut on what to keep -- and expand.
Eventually, this became a foundation and a framework. There were more experiments: eliminating email on my phone for a long while. Quieting notifications of all kinds for good. A few social media vacations and new rules for reengagement. Restructuring my calendar. More restorative activities. New boundaries around my time.
I became A Person Who Takes Time Out.
Today, I know that deliberate time out makes me better at everything else I do.
When I coach, part of the framework always includes some level of Revitalizing. In practice, this looks different for everyone. It’s about managing your energy, building in balance, empowering your self care practices and powering up a supportive environment with evidence-based tools, practices and mindsets.
I routinely hear from others — from busy moms to overstretched leaders to edge-of-burnout entrepreneurs — who want more Revitalizing, too — or who are already experimenting. Pausing to reconsider how they are approaching their work. Pausing in their daily life. Stepping out of the fray for a moment, a day, a week, a month.
Over the last couple of years, that has accelerated significantly for many obvious reasons.
What's the value of learning to pause, however you do it?
We crave sustainability.
Some level of time out is nearly always necessary for meaningful growth.
Our brain function (and thus, our stress levels, emotions and thinking) is influenced by "outside in" factors.
It's hard to be mindful when you're moving too fast.
It doesn't need to be an overhaul. A client just devised a way to add mindful pauses to her very busy days and is experiencing dramatic differences right away, ones she can build on.
Active recovery is also critical to your flow and your ability to perform at a high level over time, no matter what you're doing.
That's why one of my clients is continually reworking his schedule to include active time outs for his favorite flow activity (wherever it can fit). It's not just healthy and pleasurable. It has a demonstrated follow-on for his effectiveness at work.
Do you need to take a little time out? Is it time to hit pause on your busy life, if just for a moment? Here are a few places where an intentional pause can be particularly helpful:
When you're incubating new ideas, projects or changes
When you're going through a personally challenging experience
When you feel your momentum starting to slow
When you don't know how to get started on your goal
When you're so busy that you can't find time to eat lunch
When you're feeling overwhelmed by all there is to do
When you're on information overload
When you catch yourself playing the comparison game
When you're emotionally overloaded
When your energy is consistently flagging
When you know what to do next and you're just not doing it
When you're about to embark on a big, scary goal-setting adventure
When work-life balance sounds like a far-off fantasy
When you're feeling disconnected from yourself, your values and priorities
The evidence for stepping back from the fray is everywhere. And in spite of the research, many of us resist. In his book, Eat Move Sleep, Tom Rath outlines how simple but profound changes in just three key areas can have a lasting impact on our well being and our performance.
I would add Renew to that list, along with actively creating a supportive environment around you. I hope that you do, too.
How, and how often, do you pause, rest and renew?
What practices ground that for you? What might you "turn off"?
What challenge might you need to consider to jumpstart a new level of revitalizing and renewal?
How could you usher in a new habit to support you?
If you need help creating a plan to integrate meaningful renewal, time outs and self care into your busy life, check out my book, Nourish, or schedule a Clarity Call with me to design that for you together.
