Making motivation work for you (not the other way around)
Image: Gwen Weustink
What motivates you?
As I’ve been redesigning when and how I integrate exercise into my week, I’ve been thinking a bit more about what motivates me — not just to get on my yoga mat or try a new strength training modality, but across the board.
How we do anything is how we do, maybe not everything, but certainly many things. Patterns and habits are real, and they’re incredibly influential.
At first, I was finding the story that I’m not typical. This has been true around many endeavors, and especially around fitness. A personal trainer or workout buddy pushing me past my limit and telling me I can do more and am strong? That’s not at all motivating for me. In fact, I’ve experienced that it doesn't help me at all and has sometimes had the opposite effect.
Setting a personal record or meticulously tracking how much weight I am lifting or how many steps I’m taking? That holds my interest for about a week, though I’ve experimented with both over the years. No pain, no gain? That’s definitely not my ethos.
Yet I know plenty of people who thrive using these methods.
Personally, I’m motivated by results I can see and feel. And I’m a process goal person. In terms of fitness, I’m motivated by feeling healthy and energized. Enjoying what I am doing. Feeling my body getting stronger. Being happy with the way I feel in my clothes. I’m motivated by momentum and personal reward.
What I’ve learned is that I am consistently more intrinsically motivated than motivated by anything that’s coming from “out there,” no matter how well intentioned or how well it works for others.
Motivation is deeply individual. You may love the idea of someone goading you on as you lift a weight that could fall on your chest. Or you may not. A lot of folks find that kind of external, or extrinsic, motivation to be helpful, at least for accountability and structure. Sometimes, it is. Sometimes, it’s even necessary.
Often, we can also re-frame that external motivator to discover the root of what this action or way of being really means to us. That’s where we tap into the deeper motivations, the ones more closely tied to our values and priorities. It’s not an either-or-kind of a thing.
We can turn external expectations and structures around to find the internal motivator that’s lurking alongside. Our personal why is always within reach when we stop to search for it.
When we uncover the more personal motivations, we more easily create sustainable success. We also more easily tap into our personal power and ownership, let go of “shoulds” and align what we’re working towards with a greater meaning. For example:
“I work out because my doctor says I need to.” Or, “I work out because I feel strong and healthy when I’m doing that consistently.”
“I have to stay in this job for the money.” Or, “I’m staying at this job because it provides me with the resources I need to enjoy my present life while I’m building what’s next.”
“My mentor told me that I need a comprehensive social media marketing plan.” Or, “I am planning out how to promote my work in ways that feel right to me and relevant for my business.”
"I continually work late to impress my manager." Or, "I am committed to doing what’s needed for this project because I see it as a good opportunity for me and want to perform well."
It’s not just about internal versus external motivation. In neuroscience and psychology, it’s widely recognized that our motivation exists on a continuum. Between the external and the internal, there are the “shoulds,” or introjected motivators. These are the things we guilt-trip ourselves into doing because we feel we must. When we say yes out of feelings of obligation.
And there are the “importants” — the identified motivators. These are the activities that we do because we see value in doing them. We say yes to them willingly because we believe they matter, even if we’re not enjoying them, per se.
Research shows that the more internalized side of the scale — those activities that trigger our intrinsic or identified motivations — tend to deliver more sustainability and better long-term results for most people.
There may be a place for each type, though. For some, what moves us forward and keeps us in momentum towards our longer term, meaningful goals is a combination. For me, personally? Internal usually beats external hands-down.
What motivates you? Which kinds of motivational triggers keep you in momentum? Are there places where changing your motivational perspectives— or looking for deeper motivators— could energize you to accomplish more, align more to your values or even to revise your goals altogether?
